Are You Afraid to Lose Privileges You Have if You Transition?
You're afraid to transition because you'll lose your privilege—Dr. Z breaks down the three most common privileges holding you back and what's really underneath that fear.
First privilege: attractiveness. Young adults especially fear losing good looks in their assigned gender. Underneath? Fear you'll be ugly post-transition and lose relationship opportunities. Second privilege: career status. You're afraid if you come out, you'll lose your high-paying job and won't get comparable employment in your authentic gender. This is about security—shelter, foundation, money. For those assigned male, it's also about losing the privilege of being heard at work. Third privilege: ease of navigating life. Right now you have learned, habituated ways of moving through the world in your assigned gender. Transitioning means learning completely new social structures—like moving to a different country with a different language.
Here's the pattern: people struggling with these privilege fears typically have dysphoria that isn't severe enough yet. Watch to understand why people only risk everything when pain becomes unbearable, how the scales finally tilt, and why your most valuable assets are time and health—not the privileges you're clinging to.
