The 3 Biggest Fears of Gender Transition!
Dr. Z discusses the 3 most common types of fears in the gender diverse community and what each fear tells you about yourself and gender transition.
Fear breaks down into two categories: (1) Fear as danger signal—gut reaction type telling you to run and seek safety, and (2) Fear arising from discomfort about how change will unfold—Dr. Z calls this "homie" because it's actually our best friend. This fear arises when we're about to make change in our life, coming from something we desire and want. There's no danger present—it's about fearing you won't be able to handle how things will unfold. This is the type we need to embrace because it communicates tension between where you're at now and where you want to be.
Fear #1 (most common): Fear of how transition will affect people around you—how loved ones, family, friends, kids will respond, fear you'll lose people, fear of how you'll be perceived by society, fear of finding a job as trans-identified person. This fear is very important but has less to do with uncertainty about your gender identity. You're not fearing transitioning itself—you're fearing unknown and whether you have resources, capacity, perseverance, and strength to handle everything that will come.
Fear #2 (younger individuals 18-27): Fear of regret—making a mistake, realizing you're not transgender. This fear sends a mild warning signal to slow down. It's telling you to take your time, explore what's underneath the fear, seek a gender therapist, and investigate further.
Fear #3 (non-binary individuals): Fear of getting changes you don't want or not getting enough changes. Example: wanting voice deepening but not facial hair, or wanting skin softening but not breast growth. This fear reflects that transgender services for non-binary individuals are deeply lacking, and there will be trade-offs.
