Partners of Trans Series Part 4 | Negotiation Phase
Dr. Z discusses the negotiating phase for partners of trans-identified individuals (Part 4 in the series covering five most common phases partners go through).
In Part 1 they talked about introduction and recognizing and acknowledging things and feelings partners may feel. In Part 2 (Phase 1) they talked about coming out and what may come up. Then they talked about in the second part after coming out, the initial shock tends to settle in—as result of that initial shock, things start happening such as catastrophizing or denial.
Now at this phase of the transition process with the partner, we're stepping into what she calls negotiating phase. In negotiating phase, this is when your partner came out to you already. Your feelings had settled in and as result you had initial shock and you had a reaction out of that shock. You either most likely gave your partner an ultimatum or you were overly supportive (or maybe you experienced something else she didn't describe, but those were the two most common things people tend to experience).
In the negotiating phase of transition within a relationship, what's happening is things are settled down even more.
Watch to understand the negotiating phase and why fairness thinking is counterproductive.
