Partners of Trans Series Part 5 | Reality & Withdrawal Phase
Dr. Z discusses the reality check and withdrawal phase for partners of trans-identified individuals.
In this fifth phase—after the phase of negotiation and all the "what's right, this is not fair"—what's happening she calls the visceral phase. This is when all the feelings really hit. She would even call it the reality phase—that's an even better word. It's the reality phase when things kick in. As a result of things kicking in, you're starting to emotionally withdraw. You're starting to feel perhaps depression as a partner. You're starting to feel a lot of sadness. You're starting to have all these feelings. It's almost in a sense as if you're grieving the loss of a relationship. It's almost in a sense you're grieving the loss of your partner that you knew before.
This can be a very very challenging phase. This is not only when the reality kicks in, but this is also where you now move away from "what's fair and what's not fair" because that type of thinking of fairness a lot of times has more to do with angry feelings.
Watch to understand this difficult phase and why you need time to process before making drastic decisions.
