Beware of Reality Check Loved Ones Go Through.
Dr. Z discusses what you should be cautious about as you undergo transition—when reality sinks in for loved ones mid-transition and how it manifests in your relationship with them.
In the beginning when we come out, many people experience a level of acceptance or support. To some it may even feel too good to be true—everything is going well, everybody is being supportive and accepting. This feeling of "too good to be true" may be a slight indicator of what's truly happening.
In the beginning when we come out, most won't be presenting yet in preferred gender because changes take time. People become overly accepting and supportive because inside their brains the reality has not sunk in yet. The reality check hasn't happened for them. They know it's going to happen, but knowing something is going to happen and actually witnessing something happening are two different things.
As you continue transitioning and start presenting more as yourself, you may witness loved ones who were supportive suddenly pull back because now they're having that reality check. They may suddenly express some form of transphobia or pushing back, saying "I'm not ready for this now that it's really happening, I don't think I can be part of this."
For somebody who felt they had the support of these individuals, hearing these things can be tremendously painful, disappointing, and hurtful. Watch to find out what you can do to avoid or minimize this drastic reality check with loved ones.
